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If marriage is a computer system.. :D

Discussion in 'Tengah Komunitas' started by sicky, Sep 30, 2011.

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    sicky Lurking Around Most Valuable Users

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    HUSBAND OS
    ==============
    Dear Technical Support,

    Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance — particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. The new program also began making unexpected changes to the accounting modules.

    In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1.

    Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I’ve tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

    What can I do?

    Signed,

    Desperate

    ——————reply————————–

    Dear Desperate:

    First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.

    Please enter the command: ” C:/ I_THOUGHT_YOU_LOVED_ME.BAT” and try to download Tears 6.2 and don’t forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

    If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.

    Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

    Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).

    Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

    In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.

    You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Food 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

    Good Luck,

    Tech Support


    WIFE OS
    ==========
    Dear Tech Support:

    Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began running unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

    In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as PokerNight 10.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and Monday Night football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

    I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my other favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but un-install does not work on this program.

    Can you help me please?

    Thanks,

    Joe

    ——————————————————–
    Dear Joe:

    This is a very common problem men complain about but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a “UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT” program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run everything.

    It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained.

    It is impossible to un-install, delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system.

    I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE.EXE The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs.

    Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance. Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers 2.1, Jewelry 2.2, and Chocolates 5.0.

    Do not, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

    Best of luck,


    Tech Support
     
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    Ryan_skom Lurking Around Most Valuable Users

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    wkwkwkkwkwk.... top abies.....
    mau dunk program girlfriendnya di update terus.... hwhwhw....
     
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    adnanunique Superstar Veteran

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    haha... kalimat penutupnya yg wife 1.0

    Do not, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
    bener banget tuh, soalnya wanita ga suka di duain :peace:
     
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    saoyuan Post Hunter Most Valuable Users

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    entah kenapa ane malah ngakak baca beginian, meskipun sebenernya ada hal yang bisa diambil sih, tpi tetep aja bikin ngakak
     
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    Asuno Beginner Members

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    Just want to share an alternative option

    Dear Wife OS
    ==========
    If you can't keep up to Husband 1.0 anymore just install a brand new program that will always please you, it's called Affair 1.0. This program can only be installed once and there is no going back to remove or uninstall this program, so think carefully. If you dare to take this action, I can't guarantee that your system will always be updated to fix bugs problem. If someday your system is going to crash or have some serious problems, you can downgrade your system to Widow 1.0 Beta - Skidrow or you can take this last resort Suicide 7.0 Final Theta.


    Best Regards,
    Asuno Boot CD 7.0
     
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    lastking Post Hunter Most Valuable Users

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    gokil gan :lol:
    pas banget kalimatnya
     
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    sikomo Silent Reader Members

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    hoho..
    ada² aja nih..
    :D
     
  9. Offline

    sicky Lurking Around Most Valuable Users

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    LOL ... kalo gw nyari nya RELOADED aja deh...
     
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    Setchi Beginner Most Valuable Users

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    wkwkwkwkkkk.........
    gokil abizzzzz.........
    masak ada program Wife OS ada juga program Girlfriend 0.7
    ngaco nih Thread
    tapi intinya itu, sekali jadi Istri udah nggak bisa jadi Pacar lagi *ya ialah, udah menikah juga* :lol:
     
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    rockinpeace1991 Silent Reader Members

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    keren juga gan wwkw
     
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    markuat_kupo Beginner Members

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    kocak bro... cocok ni buat yang geek :haha:
     
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    an_syahr Silent Reader Members

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    :haha: ada2 aja, hal seperti pernikahn dibuatin kyk sistem komputer, nih cocok buat pasangn yg dua2nya asli mahir dlm sistem komputer, ntar pas propose pake cara seperti itu......biar ribet tapi pasti ada kesan tersendirinya kan ?? :hehe:

    :niceshare:
     
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    boyzgonewild Silent Reader Members

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    Anjrit ngakak banget, curiga ini yang buat anak IT. WOY NGAKUUUUUUUUUU! X)))
     
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    queenoftheearth Beginner Members

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    keren gan..
    walau lucu tapi banyak juga pemikirannya yang bisa diambil...
     
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    eNdstar Beginner Members

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    Alah, yg mther in law suram deskripsinya, :ogngacir:
    (secretary with short skirt 1.0 + sexy n beautiful expansion pack must be installed dong gan, biar seger :ogmatabelo:
     
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    zwartz Beginner Members

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    wkwkwkw top banget...

    nice nice nice :oghoho::oghoho::ogtop:
     
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